I am confuse right now. My head is spinning. I can't even focus when I was praying. Past 2 days was different. To put it nicely it was Challenging. I can't imagine that I would have reached a point in life where I have to face this. I am sick of the idiot. I am sick that we are eve related! I am looking for courage. I need to save some one I love. I have to save her. But she doesn't want to be saved. How can I go on like this? How can she go on living like this? HOw can the idiot be so selffish. I want to scream and shout, cry like a mad woman for all I care! I just want to save her. My wish and desire can't be reached. All doesn't matter now. All doesn't matter now.
If I can't save her I pray that this one does not live long enough to suffer. THis is crazy but this is for her own good. Who can understand my predicament? My rage is burning but I am not allowing it to show. I am just letting it be a small flame. Arrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhh! My head my eyes! I am hurting! My heart screams but my voice isn't heard. THis is the tug of love. I look outside the world doesn't have any meaning to me.
O Allah save us. Save her save her O Allah. Love her more than You would love the rest of us.
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