Some days I hate my maid. not hate "hate". I guess deep inside I am well aware of my dilemma. The juggle the struggle. Am I alone feeling like this? I hate her for sucking up to me. I hate her for eating our food. I hate her for using the water I hate her carrying my daughter. I hate her for preparing food for my kids. I hate her for cleaning the house. You see, I don't think one can ever achieve a employer-employee relationship for the fact that the employee have to co-exist in your house. In YOUR Room, In your storage, In YOUR FACE! ALL THE TIME! I even hate her talking to me. Some times I just walk by not listening. OR I intentionally avoid being in her way. Crazy you tell me.

Call me paranoid I checked the trashcan just now. What did she eat? Sneaking in the kitchen. Isn't she my employee? SHouldn't she be askign permisssion? Where do I draw the line? Or is it okay that she eats anything in the fridge? Or the fact that she lives in this house allows her to eat anything. Open fridge take out butter and peanut butter. Take butter knife and bread. Make milk and honey. Sit down and eat quickly and perhaps happily at her snack. Then quickly go to the toilet. wash up then go to sleep? Am I freaky????

I am thinking of getting rid of her. Why?

- her existance irks me. I look forward to her out of the house every Sunday. In fact I can't wait to hear the sound of the door open at 7:30 am in the morning when she leaves home.

- her 'dumbness' irks me.

- her carelessness tests me.

- her selfishness dumbfounded me.

- her fear of hunger amazes me. Is it that BAD where you come from?

Honestly is she of any help at all?

basic very basic care. Iniative perhaps 10% of the time? if you don't tell dont do even though its right in front of her eyes. Is she of any help at all? may be sometimes. Yes she cleans the house iron clothes, hang wet ones out, handwash the delicates. IS SHe of any help at all? Yes she is. In some ways. She feeds the kids. I honestly think her attention is more to nuha than umar. Is she of any help at all? Sometimes.

I have no obligation towards her and I don't feel guilty.